Grrrrr

I'm not in a very good mood today, nor was I yesterday. Why do things have to seem like they are going so well then one or two disturbances make it all crumble and fall. I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm pushed over my limit. We were supposed to go camping and have a cook-out this weeked, that got messed up by a friends vehicle messing up, not his fault but if him and his gf didn't come, no one else would be coming so we would have spent all that money on food and no one would have showed. So I told the babysitter this morning we would't be needing her. She got mad at me because I didn't tell her sooner and she could be out doing something else. My son will not stop crying, that's all he does. We have no food in our house, the kids are hungry, my husband got paid but we have no money still. All the bills got paid..that's great but when there is nothing leftover for two weeks what are we supposed to do. It's just been one thing after another. I can't take it anymore!!! Because we are broke, I will be sitting in the house again all weekend, I'm already going stir-crazy. I'm not going to be sane by Tuesday when my husband goes back to work. Top it all off, my birthday is Wednesday, every year is a re-run. My birthdays have brought nothing but pain and aggravation. Cant do anything, poorer then the poorest. I'm always upset or depressed about something. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I'm losing it!!